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Who talks to you the most in your life?

posted Apr 18, 2013, 5:51 PM by Barney Matthews

Let me ask you a question. Who do you think talks to you the most in your life?

Your spouse? You might have 20 or 30 conversations with them a day? 

Your boss? They might talk to you 50 or 60 times a day.

I can think of someone who talks to you 200 times more time a day.

You! You talk to yourself all the time. In fact the average person can have 12,000 thoughts a day. 

Guess what? The more we hear something, the more we believe it. What we say to ourselves affects our attitude. Its a form of subtle brainwashing. What are you telling yourself 12,000 times a day? Are you go around telling yourself - “I cant do that, I cant do that”? That is going to affect your attitude - and not in a good way. You will approach whatever it is believing that you cant do it and as a result you wont be able to do it. You’ll only give it a half hearted try and you’ll stop after the first attempt. 

Here is a suggestion. The moment you hear yourself saying these negative things to yourself STOP! Actually shout “stop” in your head then  gather your thoughts and start thinking what you want to do. 

Start consciously telling yourself “I can do this, I can do this.” Say it with enthusiasm to yourself. You’ll try harder and you’ll keep trying. It may not work the first time, remember you have be telling yourself you cant do it for  long time, its going to take a little while to change your attitude. Keep trying - it will make a difference - I promise!

That works for the moment, for those daily random conversations you have with yourself - but you can also proactively work that advantage of this concept. The more your mind hears something, good or bad, the more it believes it. So why not make sure you are telling yourself something thats going to help you? Why not use this to improve yourself? Why not use this to make yourself better? 

Here's how.

First, pick what you want to come true. For example, I could repeatedly tell myself that I am good at parking if I frequently went up the curb. But if you didnt like a particular part of your job, you could make it that. It can be whatever you want to work on.

Next, write it out in the present tense. Write it as if it is already true. For example: “I am fantastic a parking.”

Last, run the “program” repeatedly. And run it with feeling. Try repeating it every time you wash your hands. That means you would automatically do it 3 or 4 times a day. You also get to look yourself in the eye when you are doing it. As well as saying it out loud, you can also write it down each day and read that. Post it on stickies, add it as a calendar reminder, whatever works for you. The more ways the better!

You might think this is all a bit hokie to begin with. Thats OK, do it in private. But if you do it for a month, I promise you will notice a difference!